Seeking the Great "Perhaps"

We live..we die, and everything in between is our quest to attain an insight as to why we were here in the first place.


Sitting in my patio under the afternoon sun and looking out at the brown-green grass carpet around me, the simplicity that I see around is in direct contrast to the complexity inside me. And here I mean, the complexity of my mind and heart not in the routine way that they work, but in the psychological way.
We all undertake the arduous journey of life in search of our Great Perhaps, be it going to school/college, getting a job,seeking for our soulmates or towards a goal of sacrificing and giving endless love during parenthood. The only "If" is that - If we were empowered enough to see the endless train of ramifications that result from our smallest hooplas. If only...
The only way out of this labyrinth is to never get hopeless and continue the search. Because..
"Without hope life is meaningless. Without hope life is meaning less and less."

Whenever one sits back and think in retrospect, there would be a zillion moments where just a thought about, "Perhaps", would have changed the course of our lives.

During our times on earth, there would be so many of us who would have to live with things done and things left hanging on any day. Things that could have gone right, some that weren't meant to happen or things that seemed OK initially. But because we cannot foresee future, clinging to that "Perhaps" is all we do at the end of it.

P.S. - "I go to seek a Great Perhaps" were the last words of the poet Francois Rabelais. And these words have been  talked about in the book "Looking for Alaska" by John Green, in great depth.

From Femi-NIST to Femi-NAZI

For India, feminism is the need of the hour, but its interpretation has been twisted, battered and bruised. In concept, Feminism has a noble agenda of achieving equality between the sexes, right to vote, be educated, freedom to work, equal pay for same work etc etc. But this etc etc does not include hating men, praising slut hood, showing off bra straps. Feminazis, on the other hand,  have have decided to throw the noble concept of feminism away and act crazy. Rather than achieving one goal — women equality — it’s become an autocratic coercion, where supporters are required to walk in cerebral chains, timid to think differently than the leaders of the movement.

And here's why they are called Femi-NAZIs

1. Reservation -  Frankly, the seat reservation for females in buses and other means of transport is uncalled for as  reserving the seat might not make a man respect a woman. Instead, Its shouting -out-loud that woman is physically weak and incapable to even stand on her legs. 

2. Shouting-out-loud - So yes, sometimes the feminazis are just acting as high pitch bitches and being heard less. The volcano of feminist eruption has been so aggressive off late that most people fear of getting burnt in the lava of women empowerment. 

3. Confused Priorities - While the feminists are fighting against female infanticide, girl education, feminazis are on their own trip hogging limelight for issues such as, "My choice: to be size 0 or size 15", or ‘why should I cover my pack of sanitary napkin in black bag’.  

4. Men Stereotyping - Feminazis have mopped all men of the country with the same broom. Stereotyping men as wife-bashers, rapists etc is just ridiculous.

Feminazi in the making

5. Rage or Revolution - While feminism started as a revolution, feminazis have reduced it to some chal-beta-selfie-le-le-re kindda rage. Feminazis aim at wearing the skimpy clothes, late night partying,  being a rebel  without a reason as their focus areas,  giving a zilch care to the genuine concerns entailing women empowerment.

                                                                                                                                                                   

People deserve respect for their actions not for the gender they belong to. 

Seems Femi-NAZIs have  butchered the subject beyond recognition.

Why should Babas have all the FUN

Going by the intensity of expose of the spritual gurus, the aastha and sanskar channels will soon be filing for bankruptcy. Supposedly, everybody and anybody is proclaiming themselves to be dharma gurus and now have expansive platforms to broadcast themselves. Money, fame, following come in tow when these self professed gurus resort to antics like dancing on stage.

Its very hard to imagine a dharma guru, all decked up in heavy layers of makeup, latest glitzy jewelry and dolled up in red from head to toe, be it the long red tilak, the dark red lipstick, the red chuda on both wrists. Ideally, a spiritual guru's attire and conduct should be such that it invokes spirituality and simple living amidst their followers. And the way Radhe Maa dresses surely conjure carnal desires rather than spiritual ones. We Indians, follow everything too closely, be it superstar, a spiritual leader, a politician or for that matter the car ahead on the road and in the proceedings forget about our beliefs, our thought mechanism, our lifestyle and end up trying to be "that" person. The fact that spirituality has been turned into a commercial venture can be seen from the fact there are close to 30 religious channels in India in different languages.

A complaint lodged regarding Radhe Maa's involvement in a dowry case brings one more fact to the horizon, that is - " A woman is a woman's greatest enemy". In spite of being in a stature of a person who can help the society get rid of the issues such as domestic violence, dowry harassment, female infanticide, she has been an enabler to these derilictions. It has not been established whether the current pictures of Radhe Maa in short dress, boots doing rounds on internet are real as they have been reportedly  leaked by another famed notorious personality, Rahul Mahajan. But, its time people learn their lesson and eliminate the third person (read Dharma Gurus) in their divine connection with God.

Apparently, the below lines have been written for Radhe Maa

Kal raat mata ka muje email aaya hai,

Mata ne mujhko facebook pe bulaya hai.

Last heard, Radhe Maa has been entitled as a potential contestant on next season of Big Boss..

Business is NOT as usual

Today is Friday..lets work!

There are very few people around, who know what they want in life. Actually most of us are a combination of "I could do this, that,there.." and some gas (read bragging). I am no Rajnikant in this regard. When I worked, some days there was extreme focus on my career and future goals. Other days, it was just quit and sleep hangover. Now, armed with the opportunity to sleep all day, all I miss is going to office and here's why

1. The Drive

While the morning drive to office was associated with cluttered brains, boss's con-calls and plenty of under-the-breath swearing, coming back from office drives were more fun. A packet of Kurkure with a bottle of Slice along with songs on FM were good enough to beat the bumper to bumper traffic. Fridays were super as its easier to drive in casual shoes than in weekday heels. I have had some of the wow moments while driving, be it driving in rains and listening to Teri Meri Prem Kahani from Bodyguard (being a hopeless romantic) Kab se kare hai tera intezaar on a cloudy morning(feeling all enthusiastic to work) Manali trance while coming back from office on a Friday eve(upbeat about the weekend) and Mat pooch mere mehboob sanam (yes, sometimes I can be that classy in my choice of songs). Be it a traffic induced clutch-break routine or a smooth ride, driving used to be definite a stress buster, for me atleast.

2. The Food

Here, I am not talking about what my mom used to pack me for lunch or what I used to pack myself in the after marriage era. It is all about the gastronomical pleasures that one can experience and indulge in while having the palak paneer-rice combo at Nehru place, the Paranthas at Not Just Paranthas in DLF Cyber Hub (If one happens to be working in Cyber City area), the mini idlis at Sarvana Bhavan in Connaught Place in addition to all the Domino's, Pizza Huts , Subways and corporate park cafeteria offering almost every cuisine edible in India. Be it the 4pm  snack or 11am hunger pangs,choices ranged from samosa to bread pakora to the upmarket sandwiches, puffs,muffins from the CCDs around. 

3. The Talk

The morning greetings and evening goodbyes were exchanged with real people. While at home, that too in a foreign land, virtual communication is the only means of verbal exercise. From Kejriwal's antics to new vacation destinations to yearly savings fiasco to quick home recipes to the new couple sightings in office premises and some more irrelevant nonsense talks were like a whiff of cool air in the otherwise balmy work atmosphere.

4. The Fashion

Yes, office premises and beyond can give you a sneak peek into the latest fashion trends, especially Fridays, when its casual attire in most offices. The tapered ankle length trousers with peep toes, slender belts with tuck-in shirts, the high ponytail with western formals have been some of my takeaways. Come Fridays, and its all colors to eyes with everyone chic and stylish with skirts, summer dresses, head gears and danglers.

5. The Routine

After being a witness to the dapper dressing routine(sometimes forced) for almost a decade, the current lower-t shirt routine feels a drag. Office going sets the body clock ticking with sleeping, eating and working schedules and being at home is more like "do what you feel" kind of drill. As per a study by Forbes 84% of American working women want to opt out. 

And I am as Indian as it gets.

The Morning Saga.....

Single, carefree and irresponsible; that's how my friend Ritu was pre-marriage. For every other thing she had dear Mummy, from giving her sumptuous hot lunches and dinners to getting her undergarments..Literally!!!

All she had to do was get up, beautify herself , work at office, come back and occupy the bed..thats it!

This world of luxury was the price she had to pay for her marital bliss because now she is "The Working Wife".

In early morning sweet sleep she has ten things going on in her mind, already. Its like sometime in the pre-morning she is hallucinating about her maid's presence and giving her directions for work. A mental debate going on in her mind on whether to cook a healthy, not-so-tasty meal herself or again rely on office canteen's tasty, not-so-healthy food and then coming up with side effects of eating such food at office. All this going on from 6am-7am time slot when her alarm actually rings at 7.15am. Like always, she finally decides to cook for dear Hubby. Oh yes, she, as a wife has a responsibility to take care of her  husband's health.  

So after all the morning nuisance, she gets ready for office . Now there is no time for beautification, all she does is look acceptable for office. 

The so called...Working Wife!!

My friend, Ritu was having a conversation with her to-be husband ( Wudbe) about their future plans. She asked her Wudbe whether he has any objection if she works post marriage. Also, she was well aware that solitary earnings of her Wudbe will not be enough for their sustenance and keep up her lavish, not-so-expensive lifestyle. Mr. Wudbe suggested that it is ok for her to work but her marital responsibilities should not be neglected. Additionally, choice of job will be his not her's.

In the flashback..

Ritu had graduated from B-school with a decent paying job in Hand. With the salary being offered, she could get all the ammunition for the aspired fireworks in her life. From fulfilling her own aspirations to shouldering responsibilities with her Dad...she could do it all now!!Things changed after she got engaged. Her so called job was not really appealing to her fiance & his folks, though she was aware that in absence of her earnings it would be difficult to run the house.

Now Ritu has two options, either to carry on with her high paying job which gives her freedom to do what she wants but lesser time and energy to do anything else or to do a lesser paying job wherein she can fulfill responsibilities of being a wife, daughter-in-law but cannot follow her dreams.

The above two options become null and void as she enters marital life. The reality is she has to do a decent paying job and fulfill her other responsibilities as well, the way that is expected out of her. So she gets into real estate much to the displeasure of her husband who gives her a virtual list of jobs she could or could not do.

The big question that arises here is, should it be a woman’s choice whether she wants to work or not post marriage? If yes, then she should be the one to decide the terms of the work she is into, not her husband. On the contrary, when some women want to stay home and raise children, it is expected out of them to bring something to the table.

The concept of working wife takes a back seat when the husbands who encourage or coerce their wives to work or have a career in the first place, turn back and complain when she starts enjoying what she does?

Come on Indian Media..You can do better!!

Ekta Kapoor has surely ruled the roost when it comes to generating TRPs and it seems Indian Media is taking immense cue from her. For a skyscrapping TRP recipe,  involve a celebrity as the main ingredient, the mango man as a side ingredient, bring everything to a boil and serve it with hashtags of nonsensical outraging one-liners. So here we have a-la- Sanjeev Kapoor recipe type news served along with snippets on social media.

Last week news of Hema Malini in a car accident was one such dish served to us. I have my heart going out to people who have lost their lives in the road accidents and the little girl in this particular one. Though about 400 people die in road accidents everyday in India with just a tickr of the mention at the bottom of our TV screen but this particular one was breaking news on every channel for the simple reason because it involved a celebrity. The high resolution pictures doing rounds on social media and TV of Hema Malini's ripped face, her blood soaked pallu aimed at stirring the moral souls of us viewers and a tiny thumbnail of the other car(Alto) hit in the accident, aimed at non-biasedness of this coverage. With basic facts being curtailed due to the TRP race, there was lot of hue and cry made about why the little girl was not taken to hospital. Had media delved more into facts, it would have shown that the girl died in her mother's lap in a while after the accident and it was sensible to take her to a nearby hospital instead. The worst is when media coerce the people to their brink by asking stupid questions about they feel after loosing their daughter? Who should the parents blame for their child's death?

Now with the accident fading off from the idiot box, both parties involved in  the accident have taken to media to pass the buck for blame amongst each other thereby grabbing headlines again. It is very clear from the media coverage of this accident that it was news because Hema Malini was involved in it, else this incident would have been hushed underneath the sheets long back. 

Last heard, the Rajdeep Sardesai s and Barkha Dutt s are tweeting that Vyapam Scam be covered more widely by media. Finally, they realize news has to be beyond TRPs!

People are sheep. Media is the shepherd.